5 Things Children Really Expect From Their Parents, Number 2 Many Parents Don't Know

News24xx.com - When raising children, we tend to seek parental inspiration from our parents. That is, we will care for children as we grow up.

Psychotherapist Philippa Perry recently released a parenting guide "The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read". In the book, he explains how to take good care of children and give them a healthy start, but not to force themselves. Here are five main tips from Perry:

 

1. Create boundaries

The main challenge in raising children is the desire to give them whatever they need, but there are times when we have reached the limit.

Even when we think we are the most accommodating parents in the world, we still need limits.

How do we set boundaries in a way that remains loving? The answer is by focusing on "me" not "you". You decide what to expect, not your child.

Meaning, you should be able to say "I know you want to take the bus for a walk at night, but I'm not ready to let you do it."

Instead of saying: "You can't. You're still 13 years old, you're still too young."

Nobody likes to feel organized, so you explain your expectations, not the child.

2. Accept all emotions of children

Another problem with most parents is that they want their children to be happy all the time.

Because parents love their children so much, they tend to not be able to see the child feeling unhappy, then say "Don't be sad."

Though it is very important to let them feel something while we are on their side as long as they feel it.

We need to accept every emotion they feel, so they don't feel that feeling sad and angry is something bad.

3. Remember, parents are a mirror for children

Remember, that you are like a mirror for your child.

How we respond to the child will stay in and be part of him.

If you always say things like, "Look at your muddy shoes!" they will only see your angry face.

Therefore, make sure you show a lighter facial expression when referring to shoes full of mud.

Try to look happy when you see them.

Even if they make a mess, don't show your angry face too easily.

4. Every behavior is a message

If you are struggling with a behavior problem with your child, remember: every behavior is a message.

What your child is doing is trying to convey something in a way that they know.

So what you need is to find the true meaning of the behavior and help them find better ways to express themselves.

We must allow all feelings to be expressed, even if they cause discomfort.

We must help children articulate their feelings even though their feelings might not be the same as what we feel if we are in that position. Everyone is different.

Parents should always hold the principle that everyone is different.

5. Your child is not a project or task

"Your child is not a task that must be completed, or a project that must look perfect. Your child is someone who can connect with you," Perry said.

No matter whether your child is a baby or growing up, they are still human.

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